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Tuesday, June 5, 2012

My Million Dollar Idea: UnPinterest

The problem with taking time off from blogging is that it's hard to get back into it. I can't think of a darn thing to write now that I've got the time to do it again. Plus, I'm getting the feeling either no one wants to blog anymore or every one's on vacation.

So where are you fellow bloggers? Have we all run out of things to say? Or are we too busy finding pictures to pin? Is this what we have been reduced to? Looking at pictures of what people like instead of reading the words they write?

The thing is, I kind of like knowing what people don't like. And how do you pin that? Is there something called UnPinterest for our dislikes? Or are we all just trying to create a perfect space with recipes we'd whip up if we weren't so tired, home decor we'd buy if we weren't too poor, crafty projects we'd make if we weren't so uncrafty, birthday parties we'd throw for our kids if we actually threw birthday parties for our kids.

Or maybe that's just me.

Actually, I hardly ever go on Pinterest. Mostly because I can't remember my password, but also because it's very intimidating. There's just so much to look at, I don't even know where to start.

I do know where I'd start on UnPinterest though: Shades of Gray.

Have you heard of it? If not, you're lucky. It's the latest thing for the modern housewife. Every one's got to have it. It'll spice things up in the bedroom. Turn up the heat. Re-ignite a dwindling flame.
It's Porn for Women.

 Finally. Because apparently we've been missing out, ladies.

The thing is, everyone who is reading it can't put it done. They're staying up all night to read it because they have to know what is going to happen and then they have to move on to the next book. They all say the writing is terrible, but they can't stop reading it.

So my question is, when exactly are they "spicing things up"? Because it kinda sounds like they're just doing a lot of reading. Reading they don't really even enjoy because it kind of sucks. Except for the sex scenes, of course. Which they describe as ridiculous.

I guess I don't understand the appeal, so feel free to explain it to me. Maybe I don't get it because I know it started out as Twilight fan fiction. Since I'm not a Twilight fan to begin with, that's strike one. Strike two comes from the fact that every thing I've read or heard about the book says the writing is truly terrible. I barely have time to read good writing, so I don't want to throw that time away on something that stinks. And finally, it really irritates me that there are so many excellent writers not making any money while someone who doesn't know how to write anything beyond a titillating sex scene is making millions. So, strike three.

And there's my unpin for the day. Go ahead and consider this my Facebook dislike of the day also.  But stay tuned, I think I've found a new blog topic. There are a lot of things I don't like.

Next up: Band-aids.


S.P. Bowers said...

My three year old son is terrified of band-aids to the point where he will cry if I put one on his sister because he thinks I'm torturing her.

I'm not on pinterest. I can't think of any reason why I would use it.

Alyssa said...

I agree with everything you wrote here. I can't think of anything to post on my blog so it has turned into a poorly-lit-photo album (boring). Which is fine since no one seems to read it anymore anyway.

I've toyed with the idea of creating a pinboard for the stupidest things I've seen on pinterest, but that might offend the original pinners. Or worse, no one will take the time to see that I think the pins are stupid and they will think I actually LIKE that stuff.

And I didn't know anything about Shades of Gray, but I do hate masses of people who love poorly written books, let alone porn.

Maybe I should just copy and paste this comment into my blog and count it good.

meelays said...

I always told porn for women was men doing chores around the house.

Enjoy Birth said...

I picked up a Cosmopolitan magazine at Great Clips the other day. that is porn and it frightens me to think that teenagers are probably reading it!

Jennifer Shorr said...

Wonderful post, yet again. Agreed! Just make board called dislikes on Pinterest... If you really want. They have a dislikes section on the Kindergarten All About Me poster. Henry put a picture of a thumb tack (sharp things), a caterpillar (insects), & an angry girl. BTW: 6 months later, he now likes insects. Anyhow, I think I would enjoy seeing more of your list!

Nadine Feldman said...

Good post. I have never been able to figure out the appeal of books like Shades of Gray, but I think people have been reading bad books since the beginning of time.

I went over to Pinterest one time and went on instant overload. I decided no, I'm sticking to blogging and Twitter. One of these days I plan to get more into Goodreads, but lordy, that's enough!

Julie said...

I'm with the porn for women being my man doing chores around the house - love it!

Becca said...

Un-Pinterest is my world. I am the last remaining holdout. I don't even have an account. I waste enough time online skipping through the blogs people don't post to anymore.

And about crap books that make zillions? Watch Neil Gaiman's art school grad speech from last month. Then remember this part: MAKE GOOD ART. Even if nobody ever reads it, it's better to write something good than to not to.

Melanie Jacobson said...

I will give my children a million Bandaids if it will make them stop screaming that they want one.

Also, Pinterest has really good shoes. I think I pin shoes 5 to 1 over anything else.

How shocking.